becoming a mom · looking ahead · no regrets · recovering perfectionist

Why There’s Never a Perfect Time to Have a Baby (So Don’t Put Off Being a Mom)

I’ll admit it: when Kev and I decided it was time to get serious about starting a family, one of the first things we did was decide when the best time of year was to have our baby. I remember clearly thinking November would be a great month to have him/her arrive. Ironically, that baby arrived the next June but our second child was a November baby!

I don’t remember all the reasons we chose November as an ideal birth month but I do know that by the time my second baby arrived in that winter month, time of year was not the foremost thing on my mind anymore!

Of course not all mamas-to-be are concerned about the date their baby will arrive. Many are simply grateful to have a baby arriving. And many parents-to-be are concerned about much more important things than a date of birth.

Some may be concerned about their ability to be a good mother (or father). Some fear they will not possibly have what it will take to care for a little person around the clock. Others are worried about their finances.  There are probably almost as many combinations of concerns as there are parents.

But the fact is that there is never going to be a perfect time to have a baby; and just as there will never be a perfect time to have the baby, you will also never be perfectly prepared to be a mom/parent.

The truth is, no baby yet was ever born to perfect parents and no parent has ever reached perfection even in old age.

So just when is a good time to start (or expand) a family?

The time to have a baby is when we sense God leading us in that direction, when we feel him gently asking us to look at the possibility of opening our life to a little one.

Maybe we think it’s reasonable to believe that God will now expect us to have a lot of extra patience or endurance or something like that if we’re going to become parents – but that’s not at all what He’s asking.

He is simply asking for our obedience and our trust. While it’s quite possible He may lead us into greater patience, His job is to gently teach us and provide all the tools we need to master the job, one small step at a time.  Our job is to trust in Him and follow where He leads, one step at a time.

When He asks us to give life to one of His tiniest children, it is a gift from our Father himself.  It’s a gift that invites us to partner with Him in creating new life and blessing the world with a brand new little person; a gift to cherish and an awesome invitation to help raise a future soldier of Christ, one who will be equipped to show God’s love to all they meet.

God’s invitation to conceive and give birth to a brand new baby is as a kiss from God, a whisper of love that says “I know you have what it takes to raise this baby with my help.  Will you accept my gift?”

With kindness He reminds us, “Don’t wait until you have enough patience.  Don’t wait until you have all the money saved up to cover all the baby costs you can think of.  Don’t wait until you feel ready to tackle 24/7 day-to-day baby care.”

Why? Because God specializes in providing for His children – that means not only for them or you, but me and us. He can rearrange the numbers to give us all the money we need.  He can send work, a job, or a faithful friend or an angel at any time.  Nothing limits His love and ability to care for us.

Patience and endurance are noble attributes to work toward yet they aren’t the kind of things that grow best by merely studying about their qualities.  They must be practiced to truly grow.

So let us put our hands in God’s hands and follow Him joyfully on our journey, knowing that it is His delight to give us the desires of our hearts and to satisfy us richly with all good things.

“Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the LORD of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.” Malachi 3:10 KJV

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